I see often on social media sites the post concerned arguing between men and women with the question "Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?" This question is about communication. It doesn't matter who is right, it teaches us to be "good people" who must please others.
But what about the sense of value and self-confidence?
Our whole society is built on the idea of obeying others for peace. The question "Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?" advocates obedience instead of real communication. However it gets worse. Such obedience is false when person has belief that he/she is right. Healthy communication must provide free expression of dissent. Self-suppression is a bad award for happiness of others. Happiness is being yourself.
Communication means responsibility. We need to be responsible, first of all, for ourselves before we can be responsible for others.
The question "Do you want to be right?" in mentioned post is asked often instead of question "Can I be right?" People have fear and doubts to ask themselves a second question. In terms of the value of such relationship it is harmful for self-esteem. Communication works well when it helps to develop and maintain a sense of self-esteem and self-worth.
Effective communication is made of solid bricks regardless of the sphere of application.
But one should not confuse communication with the separation walls.
During many years Ukrainians had experience of poor communication with authorities.
Ukrainian judiciary has no communication with society. Ukrainian judges are like shadows without personal history. If you try to make research about career of particular judge before appointment to the position of judge, his/her legal background and experience, you will fail in most cases.
There are many separation walls between judiciary and ordinary people.
I've never heard any Ukrainian corrupted judges who have been caught in the act of taking bribes admitted guilt. They always tried to walk between raindrops and denied guilt.
A former judge Igor Zvarych who was imprisoned for bribery has called at the time of apprehension and during police questioning more than million bribe as a "Chrismas gift."
There are verses in the famous Queen song: "You don't rule me - you're no surprise, you're telling lies - you don't fool me"
A very recent case demonstrates the same level of comunication between judges and society in Ukraine. A judge Alexey Buran was suspected in of taking bribe in Odessa in March, 2016. The detectives of the National Anti-Corruption Bureau got a warrant to search his house. A judge shot detectives and escaped. Later he explained in the Parlament that he did not shoot anyone, he tried to protect his family. What a hero! He tried to protect his family and jumped out of the window from a second floor and fled!
The members of Ukrainian Parlament approved his arrest. After this Buran was brought before the court. He said in the court room that he has shot under the effect. "I am not an insane person", added Alexey Buran during a court hearing. He was arrested.
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results", once said Albert Eistein. That is so right and so cool about Ukrainian judges.